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Episode 01-21: Can You Triangulate This Love?

This is part 1 of a 2 part episode series on Love Triangles in Movies, TV Shows, Books, Comics, Cartoons and Anime that we think would have been better served by Consensual Non-Monogamy or Polyamory.
The links to the articles we mention in BOTH episodes are below but we do not speak directly to them.
Special thanks to Kevin Patterson & Alana Phelan for helping to inspire this topic through their IG Live where they talked about their For Hire series as well as THIS tweet about fanfiction taking care of polyam better than shitty canon love triangles.
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Links to articles we discuss in both episodes

  • Movie love triangles from Marie Claire
  • EW’s 15 great movie love triangles
  • Zimbio’s greatest TV and movie love triangles of all time
  • 23 TV love triangles we still have strong feelings about according to Bustle.
  • Sham talks about his deep abiding love for Trigonometry, BBC2’s show about a throuple starring a black couple and their French lady love.
  • What is this Tiger King shit? Sham breaks it down and talks about the polyamory in it while Jhen chimes in with super relevant thoughts and questions like “That lady killed her husband and fed him to the tigers.”

Let’s dive into the list we went over this episode and the triangles we discussed that might have been better as a CNM/Polyam situation

  • X-Men : Cyclops/Jean/Wolverine drama
  • Archie Comics: Betty, Archie & Veronica
    • They are CLEARLY already in a normalised non-monogamous relatonship because they are both dating him. They need to stop fighting each other and fight Archie for being a shitty boyfriend lol. MAKE A PROPER DATE SCHEDULE DAMMIT!
  • Justice League : Clarke Kent (Superman), Bruce Wayne (Batman) & Diana Prince (Wonder Woman)
    • Jhen: LIKE I SAID! This is clearly best as a throuple. Debate yuh mumma
    • Sham: NOT a true believer but he eventually comes around
  • Smallville: Clark/Lana/Lex and what could have been Clark/Lana/Chloe
    • Sham has never seen this series somehow.
    • Jhen believes that Clark and Lex are a little gay for each other in addition to the whole Lana thing. Jhen is also firmly team Chloe in the early days.
  • Arrow: Oliver/Tommy/Laurel and Oliver/Laurel/Sara
    • Jhen is of the opinion that everyone should have just been honest about who was in love with who and make it work! Laurel can have Tommy as her boyfriend while still dating Oliver, Sara is bi anyway so she’s gonna date Oliver and her her women and Oliver can date both sisters. No cheating.
  • Inuyasha: some love triangle/square with Inuyasha, Kikyo, Kagome & Koga
    • Jhen has never kept up with Anime so Shame discussed this really.
    • There is some freaky magic shit that makes this all work
    • Jhen thinks the special jewel is a euphemism for vagina
  • Scott Pilgrim vs The World:
    • Why is Scott dating a high schooler again? CREEP FACTOR.
    • Taking the problematic nature of Scott and Knives relationship out of it, this would’ve solved everyone’s problems though.
    • Sham is a Scott Pilgrim superfan
  • Cruel Intentions: Sebastian (played by Ryan Phillipe) /Katherine (played by Sarah Michelle Gellar)/Annette (played by Reese Witherspoon)
    • Based on a french book called Dangerous Liasions. Original english movie adaptation of the same name had Valmont (Sebastian) played by John Malkovich
    • I mean this is just problematic as fuck LOL. Step siblings in a throuple? EHHHHH
  • Buffy The Vampire Slayer: Buffy/Spike/Angel
    • NOT REALLY a triangle because Buffy technically never dated them at the same time sooooo this is more of a fandom battle about who is better
    • Jhen thinks Spike is the top pick and who cares about Angel anyway!
    • There are so many potential throuples in the series it’s ridiculous. Real BTVS fans know.
  • Angel: Wesley, Gunn, Fred
    • Wesley Wyndham-Price, stuck up fired watcher and Winifred Burkle connect with all the intellectual shit but she DOES date Charles Gunn, the street smart human vampire fighter first. Eventually she and Wesley do get together and she dies because she is possessed by an ancient god.
    • The back and forth about who is best for her could have been solved with Fred having the best of both worlds: getting her swirl on with Gunn and bumping textbooks with Wesley
  • Lost: Jack, Kate, Sawyer
    • The worst tv ending before GoT was like “Hold my beer bitch”
    • Listen, they were all shitty people so fuck the competition and bang it out already threesome style! Kate should have just happily dated both of them instead of sneaking around
  • Star Wars: Luke Skywalker/Han Solo/Princess Leia and Rey/Finn/Poe
    • We both agree that Luke/Han/Leia would have been a perfect throuple…if not for the pesky fact that Luke was Leia’s twin. SHE KISSED HER TWIN IN A SEXY WAY ON THE MOUTH Y’ALL! Jhen HATES when writers use the whole secret family member trope to resolve a love triangle
    • Sham likes the whole Poe/Finn/Rey throuple idea and Jhen guesses it works but she is team FinnPoe forever. Fuck that Rey chick!
    • #FinnPoe #StormPilot
  • True Blood: Sookie/Bill/Eric/Alcide/Sam etc etc etc
    • The show was on HBO but was based on the Sookie Stackhouse book series.
    • Sookie was really out here dashing out the pussy on these dudes without warning!
    • The central love triangle issue was the whole Bill vs Eric with Sookie and they should have just had a throuple and been done with it.
    • Honestly, Sookie should just have said she was non-monogamous and wanted to be a chaotic relationship person and just date fuck everyone she wanted to.

We left the episode off there and plan to continue next week with the rest of our picks!
Thanks so much for listening.
xoxo.